* learning vs. victim perspectives

forgiveness stems from a learning perspective as opposed to a victim perspective. 

from a victim perspective... when a victim 'forgives', he (1) blames the perpetrator for his pain, (2) holds himself in higher regard than the perpetrator, (3) bestows forgiveness upon.

from a learning perspective, the person in pain must recover from the physical pain, and purge the psychological pain. s/he purges the negative emotion by (1) not forgetting or denying, but (2) by understanding the totality of the circumstances -- as difficult as it may seem.

hint: the human ego (false sense of separate-self) is not designed to see connection, 
therefore defaulting to fault, blame, anger, fear, revenge, etc.

even the victim perspective is understandable, however, so maybe we can understand both perspectives.

...to be continued...