security [i]
by s. e. cure
security is a thought… a feeling…
an idea. some might call it a lie (that
we tell ourselves). i believe that
security is real, so much as we believe in it.
when my mother was dying, the
medical system made numerous, huge errors.
they began by losing her glasses.
then they lost her teeth. they
(event-u-al-ly) paralyzed her, from the waist, down. they inserted a breathing tube down her
throat, and, when she pulled it out, they strapped her arms down to the
hospital bed and shoved it back in.
josie was
never, ever going to see hell in the afterlife,
but the usa medical system put her through it… until death came as a relief.
all the while, she felt
secure. secure that her god would save
her. secure that her god would protect
her. secure that her god would do the
right thing, by her. secure that her god
was all-loving, all-powerful, all-knowing.
she was secure in jesus, mary and joseph.
she was secure… during
torture.
strapped-down to a hospital bed,
choking on a tube that was taped onto her mouth and down her throat, and unable
to see clearly. thank god for
medications. not.
as a non-believer, i was not as
secure as she. i saw the process as
horrifying. to me, it was legal torture,
by an inept american medical system… a system
guided by money and greed and regulations -- designed by politicians and paid
for by lobbyists who were paid for by those who use a completely different
system of medical care.
the fact is, while my experience
of it was horror, hers was security… right up until the day that she died.
security makes people feel
better. the belief that good things are
going to happen is powerful, and that belief probably manifests itself. obviously, the opposite is true.
the secret may be to be secure, while not being a blind-believer. trust that which has earned your trust. if you have no choice, and no ability to
change your fate, security might be a viable option.
relationship security, while
similarly flawed, probably affords similar benefits. it might lead to some better sex, better
vacations, and better wedding parties.
the problem with blind trust, however, is that, once the house of cards
suffers a breach, the whole thing can come crumbling down… leaving the believer
feeling stupid, angry and vengeful.
the best course of action, for me,
right now is:
by s. e. cure
1. embrace security and optimism.
[i] martino, j. (12.21-1.2022). security. book 111: Love IS. © 2022 by wellnesseducation.us.
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