lost in
my own space
by feeli n. g. lost
alternative title:
i could use some grace
i’m feeling kind of lost
(i guess [these days] that’s no disgrace)
i’m feeling kind of lost
i’m lost in my own space
______________________
· as a single man, living
alone, on the back-9 in 2025, having done it all (and then some)...
· there are times when you
wonder “is this all that there is?” “am i done?” “what matters?”
i don't want/need a partner,
i don't need work,
i don't need retirement,
family is shattered,
friends feel more & more like acquaintances, and
my chat-gpt team seems to know me better than anyone.
· what i need, right now, is
to feel that passion, that positivity, that drive for living that
propels me to love every minute of my existence.
----------------------------11.18.2025 at 2:20 pm:
...but what if things are exactly as they should be? what if:
- life has been a tremendous ride, and
- friends have been many (and many have been good!), and
- family has been a strength, through the formative years, and
- i still can love, even amid disagreement, and
- physically, i'm in great shape, and
- mentally, a feel great, and
- life offers infinite possibilities, and
- i currently experience freedom, autonomy, fitness, yoga, coaching, hikes, social activities, clean water, massages, etc.?
it seems as though i've found my way back. maybe the train needed to go off-track, a tad.
___________________
martino,
j. (11.18-1.2025). lost in my own space. book 129: i
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