b116 (11.30-1.2023): settling

settling [i]
by a. settler
 
settle down!  mature!
settle for your best
settle-up and join the club (so we can get some rest)
settle for the one who makes you run and dance and sing
settle for the one (what fun!) when you are
settle-ing
_________________________________
 
·        in romantic relationships, men & women settle for the best that they think that they can get, at the time.
·        a man is led to believe that this “agreement” means a lifelong supply of pussy and bjs.  how wrong he is.  dude has been misled.  it’s the ultimate bait & switch.
·        a woman will also settle… for her best alpha, or beta+, or beta, or whatever she thinks is her best shot.  she might even build-up her choice-of-a-man to her family & friends… so that they might think that the loser (him) will somehow become a family ass-et.
…but…
·        once the ink is dry on the contract, and once the honey-moon is over, she will have complete control over the (extremely rare and rarely extreme) bjs, the half-hearted pussy, and don’t even think about the a--.
·        the dumbass man, on the other hand, now gets to beg and plead and cower and “do” whatever she wants (not in exchange for pussy, mind you… not in exchange for an occasional bj, mind you… but…) in exchange for her not being angry or upset or concerned or unhappy (about something).  
·        at this point, he’s just trying to get a tiny-bit of quiet-time… hoping that he won’t unleash the wrath of the box of pandora.  dude is done!
·        ultimately, it is his own fault.  he bought-into the lie, and he tied a legal/financial knot.  he was lured-in.  he never questioned.  he never, ever thought ahead.  he never planned.
·        and now, in a legally-binding, financially-binding hell, he is still led to believe that she is the best that he could ever, ever do.
·        truth is, the only thing that he should do is to work on himself.  become a better man.  drink more water.  exercise.  get strong.  learn more.  question.  gain skills (including romantic ones).  since she has shut romance down, she has (in effect) breached her contract.  the true alpha will get it elsewhere.  she (the one who is withholding) will label him the “cheater.”  go figure.
·        the beta-male will spend his time cowering, taking care of her children, supporting her causes, and hanging-out with her low-level friends & family.
·        his best move is to bail, cut bait, suffer the financial losses, and work on himself. there are gals out there who can actually love men.  his job is to become the man that they can-not live without.
___________________________________
[i] martino, j. (11.30-1.2023). settling. book 116: love reigns. © 2023 by joal martino. 

* what men should write (on dating sites)

 when asked "What kind of relationship are you trying to build, here?"  from photographs of hot women claiming to be 20 years younger...

men should answer:

"My dream relationship would be to wire lots and lots of $$$ to a hot, virtual girlfriend -- in exchange occasional AI-generated compliments."

b116 (11.27-1.2023): pray (when you want things)

      pray (when you want things) [i]
by ask s. anta
 
there’s a man (“up there”) who brings you toys (if you just sing)
call someone who cares
pray (when you want things)
___________________________________
 
·       i figured i’d begin the christ-mas season with a quick santa clause.
 
·        send your letter to santa (if you want to), but if you want something real-istic-ally, take matters into your own hands.
 
___________________________________
[i] martino, j. (11.27-1.2023). pray (when you want things). book 116: love reigns. © 2023 by joal martino.

b116 (11.19-1.2023): gladiator man

gladiator man [i]
by ima fan
 
gladiator man
gladiator (boy)
gladiator fight
gladiator toy
gladiator battle
gladiator cry
gladiator (pawn)
gladiator die
 
___________________________________
 
·       jordan travis’ injury (during last night’s fsu vs. northern alabama game) shows (once again) that the young men who entertain us as football players are akin to gladiators in the pit.
 
·       we cheer, and some of them are glorified.  most of them suffer.
 
·       i need to take a serious look at my relationship with u.s.a. football.
 
___________________________________
[i] martino, j. (11.19-1.2023). gladiator (boy). book 116: love reigns. © 2023 by joal martino. 

b116 (11.16-1.2023): d-man is a d

d-man is a d [i]
by ima tender bar
 
d-man is a d
cut-down humor, quick
insecure (pest-y)
d-man is a d---
___________________________________
 
·      just the other night, he (1) tried to coerce a free beer for m-man, (2) tried to get me to “give” him a guiness glass, (3) cleared-his-throat (“ahem, ahem”) when he wanted a beer, and was his usual d-self while (4) “teaching” me how to pour a guiness and then (5) how to enter a phone number in the register so that he didn’t have to walk 15 feet from his bar stool.
 
·       a true d-night.  his d-like behavior has caught-on with other patrons (like marc, and mike, and even ed!) forming a haphazard team of cronies to “f-with joal.”
 
·       we are going to put the kabash on that b.s., and soon.
 
___________________________________
[i] martino, j. (11.165-1.2023). d-man is a d. book 116: love reigns. © 2023 by joal martino. 

b116 (11.8-12023): a rat (by any other name)

a rat (by any other name) [i]
by ima blind
 
it’s just a little rat
not bird, nor plane, nor frog
it isn’t even that
 
nice habit-tat:
your dog
___________________________________
 
·       the obvious is that your little habit/addiction… the one that you love more than life itself… the thing that you allow to p-ss and sh-t on others’ lawns… the rat that barks, incessantly… the animal that you forgive for ‘nipping’ at friendly visitors…
 
·       is 100% yours.  you have raised it to be exactly what it is… as you overlook what everybody else on planet earth can plainly see.
 
___________________________________
[i] martino, j. (11.8-1.2023). a rat (by any other name). book 116: love reigns. © 2023 by joal martino. 

* f--- flowers

...because you don't care about the flowers, and because she doesn't (really) care about the flowers, and (unless you are already in the LTR/marriage), you will end-up in a worse position than you were before the silly, obvious, fake-gift that can be only be described as "flowers." 

b117 #6: Love's a game...

...wanna play?

Taylor gets it right (a-lot) and she is often dead-on-balls accurate: 

• it's a Big Game, gentlemen, and women will try to convince you that you're an a--hole for being a player.

• meanwhile... women are the best of players, and "players" are who they want most!

• dude: go ahead and be Mr. Nice Guy and Mr. Honest and Mr. LTR-at-first-sight.  It (her Game) is all a sh-t test, and you will lose -- if you play the Game by her rules. 

Don't lose.

Invest in yourself and your own Game.  Become more fit.  Enjoy your own existence.  If she is not chasing you... then you are doing something wrong.  Never be needy.  Have a life.  Nurture hobbies and interests.  Flirt, without caring.  You do not (ever!) need to cower to a psycho.

Live. Your. Life. 

b117 #5: She WILL cheat on your dumb ass

You don't want to hear this, but she is out to get the best that she can get.  

You... might not be that guy (anymore).

Important: She also has two different "gets":

1. the Alpha - stud, fun, happy, fit, free, boy-toy, autonomous man, and...

2. the Beta - provider, yes-man, plow-horse, honey-doo (formerly Alpha), soon-to-be-sexless former-man.   

while she would like a fusion of them both... she will soon realize that that man doesn't exist... and she will seek out multiple men to supply her need for "the best."

b117 #4: All behavior stems from insecurity

Living things seek (1) to survive, and (2) to thrive.  Think about it.

#2 is just an extension of #1, really.   

Survival is simple: Air, water, nutrition, and propagation of the species (in its own image).  That's it. 

One could argue that it's all about propagation, or one could argue that it's all about the territory that allows for water/nutrition/reproduction, etc.

Truth is this: every-thing that you do... is for your own survival/thrival. 

Every atom, molecule, cell, tissue, organ, being/ego is (by nature) self-centered. 

Self-centered-ness... is ego-life.

b117 #3 Nobody (except you) cares about your kids.

People don't care if she is a "kindergarten graduate," or honor roll, or the next Einstein.  We acquiesce, of course, when you whip out the phone and show us pictures of your extension-of-self. 

#3 also applies to your grand-kids, car, boat, parakeet (and so on)...

b117 #1: Nobody likes your dog.

While others might smile at your dog and say cute things to your sweet, furry little life-companion (heck, they might even pet the animal): they don't like it when your dog barks, when it pees & sh-ts on their lawn, and when you fail to train it properly.

The truth is, they don't like you: the hu-man who failed to train the domesticated animal.

b117 (Title): It's True, and...

 ...you don't want to hear it.

Everyone (including you and I), has "blind spots" in our lives... in which we are simply not willing or able to allow ourselves to see through our own biases -- and to the truth.

This book will be comprised of hard Truths that apply far more often than not.

Most will be able to be expressed/described in less than a minute (and some, far less).

Let's play.